Before I tell you about Dr. Sher and his staff at Sher Fertility Solutions- New York, I would like to tell you about my husband and myself. Jason and I have been trying to conceive for 5 years with no success. Our life together has been a world-wind filled with love and happiness! And here is where our story begins…
Our first date was in 2015 and I remember it so vividly. I was nervous because it had been such a long time since I had been out on a date. We pulled up to the restaurant and I got out. Our walk to the door was a little awkward for me. See, Jason was born with cerebral palsy and has to walk with crutches and I was unsure if I needed to walk with him or go ahead and open the door to the restaurant. I did both and by the end of the night it felt as if I had known him my whole life. He made me feel so comfortable and once I relaxed it was very easy to be myself.
Shortly after our first date his father was diagnosed with stage 4 bladder cancer. Over the next few months, we did a lot of traveling on the weekends from Georgia to Tennessee to be with Mr. Jack, his dad. Jason loves his dad so much and watching him suffer from cancer was very hard. Jason always felt like his dad could do anything, including beating the cancer. At least that is what his dad had taught him. The doctors and specialist said Jason would never walk and they were doubtful of whether he would be able to live on his own, have a job, or take care of himself. His dad and mom helped him prove them all wrong. Several surgeries and a lot of physical and occupational therapy and Jason walked. Everyday tasks are harder for Jason and it takes him longer to do them, but he just gets it done. I have never met anyone who can make things happen like he does.
During this time, we started talking about getting married and starting a family. And on New Year’s Eve 2015, we were engaged. I was very happy and excited to start our new chapter. I had finally met someone who loved me for me, all of me. Once we were married, Jason moved into my house. He faced a few physical challenges getting adjusted to doing things a different way in a different place, but he has it down to a science now.
A month after being married, Jason’s dad passed away. Mr. Jack had just retired the year before and planned on spending his retirement years visiting his children and grandchildren. All of his years in the service kept him away a lot of Jason’s childhood. And he wanted to play catch up. I don’t know what it fells like to lose a parent, but my husband does know that pain and struggle.
And now we are facing the challenges of conceiving. Jason and I are both 43 years old and we want nothing more to have a baby. A little person to love that is part Jason and part Allison. Jason has low sperm count and I have older eggs. Time is not on our side. So, we started IVF/ICSI in Georgia with no success in 2017.
Jason and I then decided to try other options. I started acupuncture. It is very relaxing and I feel better after each treatment. My acupuncturist is very familiar with IVF. He and his wife had twins with IVF and he offered me more knowledge, support, encouragement, and suggestions. One of his suggestions was to call around for a second opinion. We did and before making a decision, we found out that I was pregnant in 2018, however I had a miscarriage in the first few weeks. A few months passed and we were pregnant again, this time ending in a schedule D&C in December 2018. By 2020 we had decided to try a facility in South Carolina. I had 2 IVF cycles that ended in 5 embryos, all with missing chromosomes.
And now I must talk about myself a little. I can tell you that I feel blessed. I had a great childhood with parents that love me. I am a daddy’s girl, but my mom is my best friend. I graduated from college and had a couple of successful jobs. I love doing for others it makes me happy. I also have a 13 year old son named Michael. He is so bright, loving, and caring. I didn’t truly know what love was until the day he was born and everything changed. Jason and Michael have a great relationship. It is a good feeling knowing that you have found a man who not only loves you, but also loves your child. Jason loves to do for Michael and I. He puts us before himself. He wants Michael to feel safe, secure, and loved. He wants me to be happy at all times. We all know it’s not possible to be happy all the time, but he still tries. Jason and I are both healthy and love life. We have the same morals and values. And we love our families dearly. Having a baby is the next chapter of our life.
Trying to make this next chapter happen lead my husband to do a lot of research, which lead him to Dr. Sher’s blog. My husband wanted me to call for a second opinion on our abnormal frozen embryos. I called and spoke with Mrs. Patti, she said Dr. Sher would be out for two weeks working with patients and that she could fit me in for an afternoon appointment that day only or I could wait until he got back. I was so excited that I would be able to have a consult immediately, I took it. After talking for an hour with Dr. Sher, I decided that I didn’t want just a second opinion, I wanted him to be my IVF doctor. It didn’t seem possible because the closest facility would be in New York. And I was a little nervous about traveling that far for IVF. I called back and spoke to Mrs. Patti, asking questions and getting more information. She answered every time. And she made me feel calm and at ease about my concerns with travel. She also said that I could call and text Dr. Sher any questions or concerns that I had and he would get back to me the same day. And to my amazement, he did. He answered all my questions, even the ones that I didn’t feel comfortable to ask. I talked everything over with my husband and explained to him what Dr. Sher had advised me of, I knew it was possible and that it was going to be really good for us. For the first time, I felt like a doctor was really treating me and my husband with a unique plan based on all of our medical history, his expertise and experience. I knew I was in the right place, right time, and right doctor. The next step was working with the financial coordinator. This can be very stressful and overwhelming. My medical insurance covered one more egg retrieval, biopsy for PGT/S, and one transfer. However, I couldn’t get a straight answer about whether or not I was covered to go out of state to New York. It was so frustrating. I called Yari, she is my financial coordinator at SFS- New York. She got a denial on the coverage. After telling her what I was dealing with, she reapplied for the preauthorization, called, and worked on my case like no other had. And then she called me to say that it was approved. Yari had to go the extra mile for me. Not because I asked her, but because that is what she does every time for every patient. The rest of the staff at SFS- New York make an emotional and challenging experience like IVF, less stressful with their kindness and compassion. Bushra, my nurse helped me find a hotel 2 blocks from the facility and answered all my calls. She is a very friendly and caring nurse. The ladies at the front desk are always smiling. The phlebotomist made giving blood a quick and easy process. And I hate needles and have had others who have to re-stick me several times, making it painful and leaving bruises. She was able to get the blood the first time.
In conclusion, I know this is an extremely long review, but this will be one of the most important decisions you make on your own or with a partner. This is a very emotional journey for most, mainly due to the medications. But, also because you know how much you want to start a family and how hard you have tried. Even if you handle stress well, it’s still there. It’s comforting to me that I have Dr. Sher, Mrs. Patti, and the rest of the SFS- New York staff on my side for me and my husband.
It is unknown what our outcome will be, but I know Dr. Sher is giving us the best protocol. I believe in what Dr. Sher told me the day I decided he was the doctor for me. He basically said that with faith, science, and a plan, he would do everything he could to help us have a baby.